Um...Paro

A Place to Procrastinate

Sunday, February 29, 2004
A Birthday in the House 
Last night I went out dancing with a bunch of people to celebrate my friend Tabitha's birthday. We shook our asses to the sounds of David Alvarado and Doc Martin . The space was great and loads of people were moving. I haven't gotten my groove on to good house music in such a long time. The bass was so heavy during Doc's set that I could feel the vibrations in my nostrils. (I made sure that I had my earplugs in!)
It was nice to hang with some people in LA who are becoming my friends.
Oooh, what fun we had! My legs are tired and I'm smiling.

posted at 2/29/2004 by Amparo |

Saturday, February 28, 2004
The Question That Everyone Asks 
Someone at work asked me, "So what do you want to be when you grow up?"

This question annoyed me. Was she passive-aggressively trying to insult my lowly job status? She knows that I have a website featuring my artwork. She knows that I am a serious artist. Maybe she's dense and thinks that I am one of those people who just talk about doing art but never REALLY doing it. Like herself. I don't know and I really don't care, but I do know that she's always bugging me with her social retardedness.

I've been asked this question before and I think that some people don't understand the creative life. It isn't a straight and narrow path. Our jobs don't always define us and many artists lead double (or triple, or more) lives. We have multiple jobs; some are more related to our art than others. We may juggle ways of making money by doing our creative thing, teaching, commercial work, or crap work. Sometimes we have to do something that we hate just to get by. We do whatever we can to support our passion.

Unfortunately, I've had to start at square one with the job situation here in LA since I have no contacts and I have only been here for 4 1/2 months. (It seems longer than that. Wow!) I miss my jobs in SF. They weren't lucrative, but they were flexible and gave me so much freedom. I even felt respected. On top of the regular jobs, I was beginning to photograph weddings which was another nice way to make money.

I miss having cheap darkroom access.

I know that with time, I'll make the right contacts and things will fall into place. I've been putting my feelers out and I'm beginning to feel things shift.

Patience.

posted at 2/28/2004 by Amparo |

Friday, February 27, 2004
Lessons I Miss 
I had a dream that I was singing again.

posted at 2/27/2004 by Amparo |

Wednesday, February 25, 2004
Recurrent Nightmares 
I like to write, draw and paste all sorts of things in my journals. I was looking through my old ones for inspiration and came across something that I had saved from a conversation with a friend. It illustrates a period in my life:
"...and when he would sleep in my bed, I would have the screaming dream."
It's haunting when I read it and I am so happy that I have passed through that time.

posted at 2/25/2004 by Amparo |

Sunday, February 22, 2004
Small Plate, Big Portions 
It seems like I have less and less time. I have to divide my time up between work, sleep, John, play (which includes socializing), exercise, errands (paperwork and cleaning will be lumped in here), volunteering, making art, and the business of art. Usually the art and exercise gets cut out if I make time for socializing, and vice-versa. It is frustrating and I'm feeling very off-center because I haven't done much art-making.
Oh, why wasn't I a trust fund child?
John says that I have very bad time management skills.
I just shouldn't have spent a few too many years getting silly and dancing around at raves and clubs. I'm always saying that to myself and everyone else. I know that I mustn't regret the past. Besides, it sure was a heck of a lot of fun. Those were some of the best years of my life. It was a time of losing and finding myself in the medium of dance music.

posted at 2/22/2004 by Amparo |


Waves 
After the sun came up my cousin, a friend, and I walked to the beach and watched the waves in silence. Contemplating the ocean reminded me that there is nothing to fear about dying.

posted at 2/22/2004 by Amparo |

Monday, February 16, 2004
Things aren't what they appear to be 
I just discovered a few days ago that my art website looks a lot different on other people's screens. This whole time I thought that everything was centered and then saw that only half of the site was. The worst was seeing a whole section with images overlapping text. Ugh! I am mortified!! I've been referring people to this site!
There will be lots of questions and reading of how to format the pages.
Back to the drawing board with more sleepless nights!

posted at 2/16/2004 by Amparo |

Sunday, February 15, 2004
Simplicity on Valentine's Day 
While many people were dealing with crowded restaraunts, John and I were content to eat bi bim bap and unagi don at the Marukai market food court. (It is a grocery store with mostly Japanese foods and other products. The adjoining food court serves both yummy Japanese and Korean dishes.)
It was exactly where we wanted to be.

posted at 2/15/2004 by Amparo |

Tuesday, February 10, 2004
A Simple Request 
I am going to cut and paste something from the "About" section for anyone who needs some schooling on weblog etiquette:

If you know me and you are a regular reader of Um...Paro, please inform me. This website is out for public viewing but it starts to feel a bit stalker-ish when people read this and don't tell me. It's like peeking into my open window without saying hello. And if you don't know me...welcome! Please drop an email or feel free to comment. I do appreciate feedback.

posted at 2/10/2004 by Amparo |


Why? WHY??? (I'm down on my knees sobbing) 
Oh my God...
I swear that I didn't press delete. I have no clue what the f*** happened.
All of the research that I have done in the past year and a half...the hours and hours which must've amounted to WEEKS of nonstop research if added all up back to back...IT HAS ALL DISAPPEARED!!!! All of my art resource bookmarks...the galleries, grants, residencies, web pages with more links, photo and art organizations, all of the possible opportunities, WORLDWIDE! GONE!!!
All of my hard work down the drain!!!!!!!!!!!
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!

posted at 2/10/2004 by Amparo |

Sunday, February 08, 2004
Stars 
While searching around online, I found this great quote by Oscar Wilde:
"We are all in the gutter but some of us are looking at the stars..."

It makes me think of my Natoma Home series.

It's all about seeing beauty in everything.

posted at 2/08/2004 by Amparo |

Thursday, February 05, 2004
33 
It's my birthday today! I am now thirty-three years old. (Still considered early 30's. Next year will be different...I will be entering my mid 30's. Yikes!)

posted at 2/05/2004 by Amparo |

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


About Amparo

I live in Los Angeles and I love to photograph the world around me...(more)

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